Water – Bathtub Faucet – Can’t stop the water

The stopper you're describing is called the diverter. The symptoms you're describing sound like it's gotten slightly bent or nicked. I would take it apart and try re-setting the pin. Maybe scrub it a bit with a light abrasive to true it up. If that doesn't work, replace it. I assume your diverter is in your tub spout. You can usually remove that by removing the hex-head set-screw and then rotating the entire spout (the padded handle of a hammer stuck in the spout can help you get a grip).

I have a couple of questions for you. Why are you trying to remove this section of the mixing valve body? Are you planning on replacing the entire valve or trying to repair a faulty cartridge? The piece you are pointing to is normally part of the valve assembly and there should be no reason to remove it to change out a cartridge. If you are replacing the the valve, you may need to remove the whole body from the hot and cold feed lines and install a new body specific to the new fixture. This may not be a bad idea since it sounds like the old one may be stripped now. Another advantage will be updating to a scald guard style, and install a hammer arrester at the same time.

Most often when trying to remove old fittings like this, heat is necessary, lots of heat. Any internal parts, such as the cartridge, "O" rings etc must be removed so they will not melt. Mixing valves typically are difficult to solder/unsolder because they are large and require lots of heat. I usually use MAPP gas instead of propane.

The other thought I have is if the piece you are pointing to is two pieces, you will need two wrenches. One to hold the internal part and one to turn the larger external ring. If the internal part is already spinning, it may be damaged now.