Sentence Construction – Meaning of ‘Over a Cup of Tea’

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I came across a sentence recently:

We shall discuss this matter over a cup of tea.

Why is the preposition over used here ? I first thought that it would be with, but then, we discuss things with somebody and not something. Also, it is usually the practice that we have arguments over a certain topic, so discussion over a cup of tea doesn't sound well reasonable.

Thus, I want to know,

  1. What is the meaning (in plain english) of this senetence, and
  2. Why can't we use the preposition with instead (my reason might be wrong).

Thanks a lot!

Best Answer

"Over" in this context means that you will be talking or taking some similar action during the time when you are eating or drinking something, or (much more rarely) doing some other activity.

If you used "with" in this case it would change the meaning. Consider these sentences.

Bob and Willard fell in love over dinner

means that they fell in love while they were eating their dinner. If you say:

Bob and Willard fell in love with dinner

it means they really, really like their dinner. Using this construction, even where it is less ambiguous, to mean "while eating dinner" is not very idiomatic. You can have wine with dinner; you have a discussion over dinner or during dinner.

You can restate this in other ways, however.

Let's work out the details over a couple of beers

can be restated as:

Let's work out the details while we drink a couple of beers

but this sounds a bit awkward and stilted. My guess is that that's why the shorter "over" idiom came to be--it avoids the ambiguity of "with" but is simpler than constructions like "while we eat" or "to accompany" or suchlike.

As a mnemonic--and a plausible origin--think of two people sitting at a table drinking tea. The tea is in cups on the table; the discussion passes over it, above the table. The discussion is literally happening "over" the tea.

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