Learn English – Someone who instigates conflict and then plays the victim

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Is there a word for someone who always tends to be the catalyst to conflict, then backs out of said conflict with a victim mentality? For example provoking an argument and then saying something like, "I'm done arguing, you always treat me poorly" or "why did you have to turn this into an argument?".

I'm not simply looking for words that describe someone who likes to cause conflict, such as:

  • Instigator
  • Antagonist

I'm also not looking for words that describe someone who makes themselves a victim in any conflict. I'm looking for a blend of both.

What word is there to describe an instigator who makes a victim out of themselves whenever someone responds to their instigation?

Best Answer

If they're doing it on purpose, they could be labeled a "manipulator." If they're not doing it on purpose, they could be a "coward." In both contexts, an adjective that could describe this behavior is "narcissistic."