When is it okay to use 'not' when posing a question?
I believe that the person asking would include the 'not 'when he believes the implied to be true.
For example:
"Are you going to the store?
"Are you not going to the store?"
Then the question of how to properly answer it.
"Yes, I am going to the store"
"No, I am going to the store."
and if they arent going…
"No, I am not."
"Yes, I am not."
I wonder if this is a French rule and therefore confusing to English speakers; where 'Si' is used instead of 'Oui'.
Anyways, your thoughts?
Best Answer
The lack of a different "yes" makes negative questions indeed a tricky thing in English. In French, but also in German (doch) and surealy other languages, there is a possibility to give a positive answer to a negative question. In English, it often leads to confusion.
One way to deal with it was what my Indian colleague did, very consequently: she would answer yes or no depending on the truth of the statement in the question:
It worked quite nicely, but I suspect that an IT-background and possibly a certain nerdy love of logic helped in that. Most speakers do not appreciate pure reason applied to language (as is illustrated by people not being amused when I answer "yes" when they ask if I would like tea or coffee.)
I think you are right in assuming that you would normally ask a negative question when you assume the answer to be likewise negative. So if you assume someone did not do something, you can ask you didn't do that, did you?.
A reasonable answer could avoid yes or no: "Indeed, I did not."
If your assumption is wrong, however, you pose a bit of a challenge for the answerer: they'll have to go for something like "you are mistaken. I did do that" if they want to avoid any possible confusion. There are several options, but a simple yes or no are indeed ruled out.
I think it is safe to say that negative questions are almost by definition not yes/no questions, but there are plenty of confusion-avoiding ways to answer when you want to deny the (negative) assumption. To confirm the assumption, either yes or no will do:
If the assumption is wrong: