How to end a romantic relationship with the butler

The Sims 3 is notorious for high CPU and resource usage, especially when you get multiple households and things going. Try opening up the task manage (ctrl+shift+esc) while playing and take a look at the CPU and Memory percentages. If they are pegged at 100% or close to it, that may be the problem.

The game does try to "optimize" by instead of the entire game chugging, only certain processes of it do, like sim behavior and the background world simulation (which is why everyone is tired). Something to try is lower the various settings, or removing households you don't really care about so the background simulation doesn't have to work as hard(backup your save in case this doesn't work!).

You can not disable it as far as i know but you can reset it, even in a legit way. With the generations expansion pack comes a new lifetime reward "clean slate" this resets all the reputation. This is the only legit and mod-less way of getting rid of your reputation. Not sure why you want this, if you do not mind cheats you can boost your lifetime points with a cheat and buy the clean slate reward that way.

Spoiler (cheat)

Press CTRL+SHIFT+C to open up the console and type in "testingcheatsenabled true". Now go to the lifetime happiness tab (where you see that treasure chest), hold SHIFT And click on the treasure chest to add 500 per click.