Metagaming
First, lets kill the metagaming ad hominem: "Metagaming is any strategy, action or method used in a game which transcends a prescribed ruleset, uses external factors to affect the game, or goes beyond the supposed limits or environment set by the game. Another definition refers to the game universe outside of the game itself."
Optimising a combat-oriented character to be good at combat within the rules is not and never can be metagaming. You can't even mount a game universe argument that it is: a person who has devoted his life to being a wilderness warrior (aka a Ranger) is going to learn to be good at fighting or die!
Comparison
Hit Points
Your hit point edge is insignificant; an 11 hp advantage is, on average, 2 hits or 1-2 rounds more staying power in a combat (less if fighting multiple foes). When you consider that the Paladin has an ability to heal 15 hp with their Lay on Hands ability at the cost of an action, they effectively have more hp than you do. You do have a definite advantage if you are being hit by things like fireballs; on failed saves you are the only one left standing.
This is an edge but a small one.
Damage output
I will assume everyone has the same stat modifier on damage rolls.
If you are using your bow and choose to use a spell slot for Hunters Mark, you can do 3 + d8 (bow) + d6 (Hunters Mark) (avg 11) on the first hit and the same plus d8 (Colossus Slayer) (avg 15.5) on subsequent attacks. This is great if you are fighting a monster with lots of hit points; it is not so good against a dozen goblins since the first hit will drop them and your Colossus Slayer never kicks in.
Meanwhile the Paladin with a longsword and the dueling fighting style is doing 3 + 2 + d8 (longsword) + 2d8 (Divine Smite) (avg 18.5) (I haven't considered some of the really cool spells they have).
The Rogue is doing 3 + d8 (longbow) + 2d6 (sneak attack - a good rogue should almost always get this) (avg 14.5).
The Sorcerer has a plethora of options (Magic Missile, Burning Hands, and Cloud of Daggers spring to mind) or they can just fall back on a damaging cantrip for d10 (avg 5.5). If they are a gambler, Hold Person can end a combat with a single humanoid on one failed saving throw.
If the Bard wants to be handing out massive damage in combat then they chose the wrong class; that is not where their talents lie, they are an enabler - they enable others to do more damage.
The Ranger is not the best at handing out damage.
Overall, you are playing your character to his strengths; are the other players playing to theirs?
Pacing and Encounter structure
You say "I was typically able to go first in any combat due to high DEX, and dealt such insane damage that the guys going last did nothing".
I read "The encounters are underpowered".
Don't misunderstand me: it is the nature of RPG that the PCs will win (almost) every fight because they can only lose once. Most combats will be and should be cakewalks, they are there because combat is fun and they consume resources. That said, they shouldn't be so insignificant that they are over before the first round ends. A quick combat like this is great if the players have planned and executed a great ambush, its not great if it is just way underpowered.
If you have enough spells to use a spell in every combat then you are not having enough encounters between long rests. Burning through spell slots for a non-core spellcaster should be a tough decision: "Do I use it now or will I need it latter?" If you are not thinking this, at least briefly, all the time then your DM is being easy on you. Fights early in the day will usually be easy but this is due to everyone having lots of resources, as you burn through spell slots and hp the same encounter becomes much harder.
Also, the structure of encounters matters. 5 PCs on one monster is an easy fight (unless the monster's CR is extremely high for the party); the monster can only target 1 PC while copping damage from all 5. 5 PCs on 5 monsters is much harder; the tough PCs have to control the battlefield or the squishy PCs will get squished. 5 PCs on 15 monsters, even very weak monsters, is really hard; everyone is copping damage and the fight will last 4-5 rounds minimum.
In Unearthed Arcana: That Old Black Magic (2015), they playtested a Tiefling Variant with an Abyssal Tiefling subrace. The Abyssal Tiefling gets this Abyssal Arcana trait instead of the original Infernal Legacy trait:
Abyssal Arcana. Each time you finish a long rest, you gain the ability to cast cantrips and spells randomly determined from a short
list. At 1st level, you can cast a cantrip. When you reach 3rd level,
you can also cast a 1st-level spell. At 5th level, you can cast a
2nd-level spell.
You can cast a spell gained from this trait only once until you
complete your next long rest. You can cast a cantrip gained from this
trait at will, as normal. For 1st-level spells whose effect changes if
cast using a spell slot of 2nd level or higher, you cast the spell as
if using a 2nd-level slot. Spells of 2nd level are cast as if using a
2nd-level slot.
At the end of each long rest, you lose the cantrips and spells previously granted by this feature, even if you did not cast them. You replace those cantrips and spells by rolling for new ones on the Abyssal Arcana Spells table. Roll separately for each cantrip and spell. If you roll the same spell or cantrip you gained at the end of your previous long rest, roll again until you get a different result.
Abyssal Arcana Spells
| d6 |
1st Level |
3rd Level |
5th Level |
| 1 |
Dancing lights |
Burning hands |
Alter self |
| 2 |
True strike |
Charm person |
Darkness |
| 3 |
Light |
Magic missile |
Invisibility |
| 4 |
Message |
Cure wounds |
Levitate |
| 5 |
Spare the dying |
Tasha’s hideous laughter |
Mirror image |
| 6 |
Prestidigitation |
Thunderwave |
Spider climb |
I would assume that homebrew could trust this list to be at least somewhat balanced as possible spell replacements, since it made it to UA. However, keep in mind that UA is not strictly canon, but rather playtest material from WotC game designers.
In that regard, the Infernal Legacy trait looks a lot like a Dragonmark (from Unearthed Arcana: Eberron (v1.1)) or the Magic Initiate feat (PHB, p. 168). You could also skin one of those feats into a racial ability, as a homebrew that wouldn't deviate too much from the rules.
And completely RAW, you could always do a Feral Tiefling with the Devil's Tongue trait (SCAG, p. 118), too.
Best Answer
Usually a solution to this involves both some out of game and in game lubrication.
Agree As A Group
Does everyone want to play a game with this tension - the players and the DM? The DM can always disallow choices at their table if they think it’ll be disruptive to the game at hand. The group needs to say that:
Also, it’s an opportunity to introduce racial tension and dynamics into the game, but not everyone wants that, so other players have a vote too.
The “generic” racial attitudes in D&D don’t hold in all campaign worlds or even all of a given campaign world. If people just want the sweet stat bonuses without the roleplay you can just remove that element if that’s the kind of game you want.
Now as for in game...
Individuals are Individual
Sure, these different humanoid species, in general, have beefs with each other. But just like real world people groups that have beef with each other, it’s severe in some places and with some people and not so severe in other places with other people. There’s some orc with an elf fetish out there somewhere, or that was rescued by elves as an orphan, or... Loki and Thor from the Marvel movies are semi good examples if Loki calmed down a little.
Depending on what setting you are using there are usually plenty of examples of atypical race relationships. Remember, PCs become adventurers because they are exceptional - if they were they typical member of their culture they’d have some lame job and not speak until a PC entered their room.
We Have A Job To Do
How many books, movies, and TV shows have a premise where people that don’t get along are brought together because they have a bigger thing they need to achieve? Conservatively, half, starting with the Epic of Gilgamesh? Read a book!
Aliens and humans, vampires and humans, jocks and nerds; from serious things like Hidden Figures and The Green Book to the ridonkulous like Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Slayer and Enemy Mine, you have historical foes brought together because there’s something they need to achieve together, a doom they need to escape and need every hand, or just work for someone who doesn’t give a crap about their beef.
This requires you the DM to come up with a premise that ideally lets players who aren’t My Guying too hard to have something to cling to in order to justify their character still working with another.
I’ve been running games since the ‘80’s and I’ve seen every single weird combination of characters; but as long as players understand the group’s fun comes first and the DM and players put some basic hooks into the game to foster cooperation it shouldn’t be much of a problem.