Kerbals can't die for any other reason than lithobraking (just like aerobraking, only difference is that you replace the atmosphere with the ground) and a collision with an object.
When you're in control of the command module, try switching to Neil by using the [ and ] keys. Unless there's a lot of debris near by, it should only switch between the module, flag and any kerbals on EVA.
If taking control of Neil doesn't work while you are in control of another object, you can go back to the space center and enter the tracking station. There you will be able to select your kerbal from the list on the left and press the "Fly" button.
The only thing that could prevent you from taking control of that poor kerbal is a bug.
In this case, basic troubleshooting. Reload your save file. If that fails, restart the game. If this fails, well, assume that Neil met the kraken.
You could also try bumping him so some of its variables in the code are changed.
If all fail, well, roleplay it. He died of hunger while you pressed the big red button in the tracking station.
What you're looking for is called translation, and it is possible in KSP. But you'll need Reaction Control System enabled on your vessel to be able to do it.
You can use H, N, I, J, K, L (default keybindings) to perform short RCS thrusts in every direction. Or you could switch to docking mode (it's the small blue button in the bottom-left corner of the screen) and press the space bar to switch A, D, W, S between rotating the craft and translating it.
Best Answer
The wiki page is talking about a maneuver node that you would normally use in space to mark a prograde/retrograde/etc. burn. There is no special "landing" node. By placing it on or near the surface, you can gauge roughly how much time you have until landing.
There is currently no stock way to place one exactly on the surface. Just place one as close to the surface as the game will allow.
You don't really need to worry about the inaccuracy of not being able to click on the exact landing point of your trajectory, because unless you're at the very margin of your fuel supply, it doesn't hurt to have the extra few seconds of buffer before the last few meters of your visual approach.
Once you are within the last few meters of your landing, you should be able to judge your height based on your shadow, which should now be visible.
If you are running very low on fuel, you should quicksave and then try suicide burns from different altitudes and not worry about your time to impact as such.