Learn English – Other ways of saying “letting me know” or “telling me about”

In the context of your question, "support" seems to be an appropriate counterpart to "blame." If that makes sense to you, then consider The word "bulwark," a synonym of support, which has a useful meaning that deals specifically with conflict situations where one person strives to solve the conflict instead of lay blame.

Bulwark (n): any person or thing giving strong support or encouragement in time of need, danger, or doubt.

The word itself is a little clunky, but if your girlfriend is the person to offer support and encouragement, this word could serve your need.

In terms of working for the good of the group and avoiding petty disputes, you can call her a "collaborator."

collaborator (n): to work with another or others on a joint project.

As attributives, both of these could concisely describe her assets.

Good luck.

Yes.There is a saying which relates to this. Corner a dog in a dead-end street and it will turn and bite

Also,I have read this "back a dog up in the corner it's gonna bite", which means 'If you annoy/irritate something long enough and don't leave an escape route, then they will attack if they feel threatened'